Archive for May, 2009

Theft Victim Slashes Suspect With Machete

Posted by Rob on Thursday, 28 May, 2009

A guy in Athens, Georgia took matters into his own hands when his TV was stolen in a burglary, Friday the 13th style.

Apparently the theft victim confronted the man he blamed for the robbery by smashing out the driver’s side window of the suspect’s SUV. When the suspect got of of the vehicle, the guy slashed him with a machete.

Cutting the suspect’s wrist to the bone, a doctor later told the authorities that if the machete struck the suspect’s wrist more squarely, the weapon could have hacked his hand clean off. Jason Voorhees would not have made that mistake.

After being assaulted, the suspect took off, to be pulled over for a motor vehicle violation later that evening. When stopped, the officer saw the large gash just above the man’s wrist.

The officer arrested the suspect on two previous probation violation warrants and took him to Athens Regional Medical Center. It was then the suspect reported that he was attacked with a machete by a man earlier that night.

Doctors stitched the suspect’s wound, put his arm in a splint and released him back to the police.

I don’t think he will be ripping anyone else off anytime soon.

Be Safe, Be Prepared.

Other Machete Related Blog Posts:

No Coconuts for You!

Machete Becoming Bay State’s Weapon of Choice?

Machete Attack Leaves Two Hospitalized

Popularity: 9% [?]

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Tour de France, Inmate Style

Posted by Rob on Tuesday, 26 May, 2009

I can’t wait for the results of this one…

Someone in the French penal system must be thinking, “What could possibly go wrong?”

Apparently it has been decided that a 1,400 mile (2,300 km) Inmate Tour de France on June 4 would be a excellent idea to foster values like teamwork and effort.

Starting in the northern city of Lille, they are expecting almost 200 prisoners to bicycle around the country with 17 stops in towns with prisons. Which incidentally doesn’t really matter since the cycling inmates will not bunk in the jails, but will be put up in hotel rooms.

Don’t worry about supervision, 124 guards and prison sports instructors will accompany them during their race.

Wait, it really isn’t a race, there will be no place ranking. Remember, the idea is to foster values like teamwork and effort. The 196 prisoners will only cycle in a pack and there will be no breakaway sprints allowed.

“It’s a kind of escape for us, a chance to break away from the daily reality of prison,” says a 48-year-old prisoner.

Really? An escape and chance to break away?

So let’s do the math here. 196 inmates released to do a 1,400 mile bicycle tour with 124 guards and sports instructors… If all the inmates work together and decide to “kind of escape” about 700 miles out, and if all of the guards decide to chase and catch one different prisoner, that still leaves 72 unmatched fleeing inmates. On bikes… In the middle of nowhere…

“This project aims to help these men reintegrate into society by fostering values like effort, teamwork and self-esteem,” says Sylvie Marion of the prison authorities.

“We want to show them that with some training, you can achieve your goals and start a new life,” she said.

Following real Tour de France tradition, the finish line will be in Paris. If they all make it that far.

Good Luck with that one France.

Be Safe, Be Prepared.

Past Bicycle Related Blog Posts:

How safe is your bike?

Lance Armstrong Bicycle Jacked!

Thief steals 66-year-old bicycle from an 83-year-old woman

Popularity: 10% [?]

Student expelled for eyebrow shaver in purse

Posted by Rob on Friday, 22 May, 2009

15-year-old Taylor Ray Jetter is a Girl Scout, as well as a member of the Linton Middle School basketball team, choir and leadership team in Penn Hills, Pennsylvania.

Unfortunately, a disciplinary hearing this past Wednesday has school officials recommending she is expelled for the rest of this school year and another 45 days next year for carrying a weapon to school.

So what dangerous weapon was found during a random search of her purse and got her suspended?

A gun? No. A knife? Nope. Um, an eyebrow shaver? Ding, ding!

Are you serious? I’m thinking someone should recommend some school officials be removed from office.

Just where and when have we lost all shreads of common sense here?

Of course the teen didn’t consider the eyebrow trimmer a weapon and now fears this action may hurt her chances of becoming a nurse-anesthetist. I’m sure most rational thinking people would not consider it a weapon, unless you are some sort of idiot.

Linton Middle School released an official statement saying they have a “standard disciplinary policy that addresses all students equally.”

So good grooming practices are frowned upon here or are a bunch of bushy eyebrows feeling threatened and complaining to the principal?

Are these school officials high-fiving themselves for preventing some sort of murderous Columbine-like rampage by a girl scout with a cosmetic accessory?

I am sure there are several different kinds of eyebrow shavers and trimmers out there but I found a picture of what some of them look like.

WARNING: Please don’t be afraid! This is only a picture and the image can NOT hurt you in anyway!

Be Safe, Be Prepared. Shave your eyebrows in the safety of your home.

Popularity: 10% [?]

Fake Cougar Tasered in Michigan

Posted by Rob on Wednesday, 20 May, 2009

I usually tend to side with law enforcement on Taser use. Typically you have the cases of belligerent, drunk or otherwise unruly individuals resisting arrest or failing to obey the simple orders of a police officer. Then they get tased and wonder why. Don’t Tase me, Bro!

But this story out of Warren, Michigan leaves me puzzled.

Apparently, 911 was called when someone saw a huge cat, bearing resemblance to a 150-pound cougar in Bates Park. I suppose that report would cause some concern.

Local police dispatched 10 officers to the scene of the prowling cougar and the animal’s silhouette was spotted hiding in a cement drain pipe.

A Taser was deployed and the animal was zapped. It was then they realized it was only a toy stuffed animal.

Roar I Say!

The Police Commissioner said investigators now believe the incident was a prank that cost the police department about $1,000 in wasted police hours from responding to the scene and filling out associated paperwork.

Ashton Kutcher was not reported on the scene, so it probably wasn’t an episode of PUNK’D.

But now the citizens of Warren can rest assured that there is one less stuffed animal on the loose.

Be Safe, Be Prepared.


Related Taser Stories:

Don’t Tase the Emu, Bro!

Mixed Martial Arts Champ KO’d by Stun Gun

Popularity: 12% [?]

Gun? What gun?

Posted by Rob on Monday, 18 May, 2009

A 17-year-old in North Carolina attempted to holdup an internet café after requesting a Mountain Dew by pointing a concealed banana under his shirt at the owner.

“Is that a banana in your shirt or are you just happy to see me?”

The café owner and another customer grabbed the teen and the weapon was revealed to be a fruit, not a firearm. The police were called just after 1 AM and as the owner and customer held the teen in a chair, the would-be robber ate the banana.

I suppose using a banana is more realistic because trying to just point your finger under your shirt to resemble a gun isn’t quite as believable.

“If he had had a gun he would’ve shot me,” owner, Bobby Ray Mabe said. “But he had a banana.”

“And the deputy said, ‘Aha! He ate the evidence,’” Mabe said. “But we had the banana peel, and they took a picture of it.”

Now if he was able to stomach eating the peel too…

The teen was later charged with one count of attempted armed robbery and the Deputies joked about charging him with the destruction of evidence.

Apparently he was also charged with a robbery of a nearby Kangaroo Express that occurred just before the internet café incident.

Perhaps he stole the banana at the Kangaroo Express?

Be Safe, Be Prepared. Eat your bananas, they have lots of potassium.

Popularity: 12% [?]

“Neither snow nor rain… nor gloom of night…”

Posted by Rob on Friday, 15 May, 2009

You’ve heard that old US Postal Service slogan “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds”, or whichever other variation applies.

I suppose weather conditions are one thing, just don’t add a dog in the mix. Especially a 20-pound Jack Russell terrier.

Apparently a frisky Jack Russell terrier in Clarksburg, West Virginia has interrupted the mail delivery to at least seven homes on Milford Street.

A mail carrier was even injured after falling down trying to run away from the dog named Cozmo.

Cozmo’s owners have said the dog has never bitten anyone, but has escaped the yard a few times.

The owners and neighbors have been told their mail delivery will not resume until Cozmo is no longer residing there. Bad Cosmo!

Nothing a shot of pepper spray wouldn’t solve.

EPA approved Mace™ Muzzle pepper spray for dogs provides safe, effective and humane protection against canine attack. It is ideal protection for walkers, joggers, cyclists or delivery people and stops attacking dogs, forcing them to retreat.

You’ll never have to be scared of another dog if you keep >”Mace Muzzle with you whenever you’re out.

Mace Muzzle canine repellent is an excellent product for defending against attacking dogs.”

This specially formulated pepper spray is designed specifically for dogs and has been proven to be effective in encounters with aggressive canines. If a dog attacks you, spraying this repellent in it’s face will stop him in his tracks.

It will overpower the animal and he will retreat. If you jog or take walks, then you should carry this dog spray with you. It is lightweight, easily accessible, and will provide fast protection when you need it most.

I’m not sure why a canister of dog repellent isn’t standard issue for all UPS drivers, US Postal Mail carriers and all other delivery personnel that routinely encounter animals.

We aren’t spraying to hurt the animals, we are spraying to stop the animal from hurting us. It is normal for most dogs to roll on the ground and rub their eyes in an attempt to remove the spray from the facial area. The painful, irritating effects usually wear off within several minutes, leaving the dog unharmed, but perhaps a tad wiser…

Dogs aren’t stupid. They will get the point.

Protect yourself, Protect your family, Be Safe, Be Prepared.

Popularity: 13% [?]

118 Successful Ninja Burglaries, and Counting

Posted by Rob on Thursday, 14 May, 2009

Police in Jefferson County, Colorado are having a problem catching a cigarette-swiping burglar. Apparently this man, dubbed the “Nighttime Nicotine Ninja” is thought to be responsible for at least 118 burglaries, in 18 metro area jurisdictions, while netting $120,000 worth of cigarettes over the past two years.

He is dressed in black and wears a black mask across his face to conceal his identity. Not exactly regulation ninja ensemble, but it works.

However, his key to success is that he strikes gas stations, convenience and liquor stores in the middle of the night, often breaking out front glass windows and doors. Not sure how much noise he is making but at least he is using the cover of the night to act all ninja stealth-like.

At least this guy is getting part of the ninja routine right, unlike our recent katana wielding ninja at the dry cleaners at 8 AM in the freaking morning.

Once inside the store, the “Nicotine Ninja” with discerning taste only steals name brand cartons of cigarettes and leaves the generic brands behind. He also leaves other items untouched, like lottery tickets, cash registers and other typically valuable targets.

Since this ninja is still at large, the rest of the details are still unknown, as far as what ninja weapons he carries or other important tidbits. Just as a ninja would want it too be.

Police are entertaining the possibility that this may be a well coordinated group of ninjas, since there have been so many similar incidents over a rather significantly large but local area.

If the Nicotine Ninja’s 2-year crime spree is any indication, it may be increasingly difficult for the police to foil his next hit, unless of course the Colorado Police deploy an Anti-Ninja Task Force comprised of former ninjas, trained in the art of Ninjitsu.

That or find a Spartan Warrior. (Yes the Spartan beat the Ninja on the Deadliest Warrior TV show.

Be Safe, Be Prepared.


Other Ninja Related Blog posts:

Failed Ninja Robbery Attempt

Kangaroo Intruder Terrorizes Family in Australian Home Invasion

Enter the Whale, the Inconspicuous and the Shark

Popularity: 13% [?]

Changes to our TASER Product Line

Posted by Rob on Wednesday, 13 May, 2009

Awhile back, TASER came out with some cool TASER® C2™ models. They had a Forest Camouflage, a Desert Camouflage, Fashion Pink, Red Hot and an interesting Leopard Print to choose from along with the standard Electric Blue, Black Pearl, Titanium Silver and Metallic Pink models.

It seemed that there was a TASER of a different color to satisfy just about anyone’s sense of fashion and taste.

Sadly, a few of the models have hit the chopping block. I wouldn’t have thought that it would be a big deal to carry several different plastic casings, all of the guts are still the same, but apparently 9 flavors is too many.

Forest Camouflage, Desert Camouflage, Fashion Pink, and Leopard Print are now no longer being produced. If you have one already, it will still be covered under TASER Warranty but they are now Collector’s Items.

The ADVANCED TASER® M-18™ and M-18L™ has also been deemed obsolete and will no longer be offered. Instead, the TASER® X26C™, modeled after the TASER® X26C™ Law Enforcement model will continue to be offered to civilians.

So now your TASER C2 Devices are still available in Electric Blue, Black Pearl, Titanium Silver, Metallic Pink and Red Hot (Black Pearl only without Laser sight) and the TASER X26C is available in Black.

In police studies, the TASER X26C and TASER C2 has a higher instant incapacitation rate than 9mm hand guns. The civilian model TASER Devices shoots out 2 darts attached to 15 feet of wire. 50,000 volts travels over the wires and over-rides the central nervous system providing incredible takedown power.

Not everyone wants to carry a firearm with the potential for taking a life in self-defense. Normal stun guns require you to be dangerously close to your attacker (although your TASER Device can be used as a contact stun gun in a pinch). The personal TASER X26C and TASER C2s eliminates these problems and provides a less-than-lethal way to stop aggression and allow you quickly escape to contact the police.

Be Safe, Be Prepared.

Other Related TASER Blog Posts:

Your Life is Worth More than the Cost of a TASER

Who Would Win a Fight, a TASER or a Stun Gun?

Popularity: 12% [?]

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